I cannot see my dog being bullied! Why would she deserved to be shouted like 过街老鼠? I don't understand why would my dad shout at her everytime he sees her? I think it's a childish act wtf! She actually lives in agony you see? I wanna bring her out of this kind of life! Today I have made up my mind, decided to bring her to Malacca and stay at ZS' house. This does not mean her miserable life will end there. But at least I get to see her everyday if I want to lar. Ginny, don't worry, Mummy will go visit you everyday k? She is supposed to be a dog kept in house, but I have no choice have to leave her outside again (though it's against my will), since it's not my house and his housemates may not like her as well. So, here you go Ginny, I brought you a new life, hope you adapt it well and be obedient k? You are always lovely in mummy's eyes :) You outsiders would not know how loving she is when she sees me. Greet me like countless times without feeling bored. I can see from her eyes, they tell me "Mummy show some love to me!" She is just as manja as I do, the difference is just that no one replies my manja, unlike me, I will at least pat her head and start brushing through her fur. I love her very much (when she is not naughty, in fact she was never naughty to me, just being playful like other kids, I kid you not kids these days can be mischievous x10000000000000000000000 no longer like our times k? I know it because I was a kindergarten teacher who got bullied till I cried. embarrassment!) Anyway, I look forward to this new life of Ginny! Please, everyone please sayang her to the max ok? She is so lovely if you get to know her more, and trust me she knows who treats her bad and good! So be good to her ok? :) She will love you more than you love her one, but she will still love me the most! ❤

｡◕‿◕｡ by girlny @ 1:40:00 PM




I don't want to give you away. But all I heard about you were only complaints, never-ending complaints. Everytime when this occurred, I always had mixed feelings. You are only annoying to my family, you just could not be a part of them. The reason is just that you destroyed, you did not contribute; you annoyed, you did not create happiness; you created noises, never had they think you brought joy. It is very heart-arching when beating you, it hurts my heart just like how hurt you are on the skin. I felt like teaching a child, a rebellious one. I always told myself, you are still young to understand human's language; still too young to be obedient; all sorts of reason for you to be naughty and mischievous. I cannot afford to sacrifice more high heels as your toys. Both heels were my mum's favourite and preference heels, but now they could not be worn because of you. I totally understand when one loses her favourite belongings especially shoes. My dad has hung a pair of the heels around your neck, it hurts my heart but I insisted because I thought you'd learn from your previous mistake, but you disappointed me tonight, it did not work as a reminder for you. There is nothing I can do, I feel so helpless, do you know? How would you know? If you knew it, you would not create this kind of troubles. Looking into your tearful eyes, they told me you knew you were wrong, you did not avoid when I beat you so hard, you whined sometimes. You looked so innocent with your big eyes staring, it makes me felt like I wrongly blamed you. When will you learn? You are 7 months old, I can no longer pamper you like you were 1 month old, so tiny. I am so grateful you are a small sized dog, just like how I expected you to be when I got you. Although you are not as cute as before, you are still lovely to me; always chased and jumped around when I was in sight, always alert when I called your name, always gave me your paw to greet me. I am sorry I cannot provide you a proper shelter. Anyhow I am not going to give you away. When you were so young, I used to slap you because you whined too much, I could not have proper sleeping time, always awake to take care of you because you were fear of darkness, but watching you sleep on my laps securely just could not be described in words. Sometimes, out of anger I shouted, "you are just a dog!". I am ashamed. When you learnt how to bark, it was headache, you tend to bark non stop, the habit remains till now, but I believed you barked when you saw something invisible to us. I remembered there was once I threw you out of the house shouting "I don't want you anymore!" you stood still and attempting to get in, I brought you even farer, when my mum asked you in, you stood far and refused to come back until she carried you, maybe you knew you did not deserve treatment like this. There was another time, you ran out with Doggie, you ran to a neighbour's gate, he opened it and you wanted to sneak in, were you thinking to get a new master who can treat you better? Maybe you were. I were ashamed of myself. I cannot just give you away, because we have special bonding. When I was beating you just now, you came near me seeking protection from me. You do not do this to others, only to me, from this I know you trust me, although I could hardly see you, I know you can still recognize me as your master because we have this unique bonding other won't have with you. I learn to know how my mum felt upon beating me when I was still young. This is the time I should really think for your future.


｡◕‿◕｡ by girlny @ 1:05:00 AM



Today I am super emo, just like my title!
Don't ask me why, because I myself do not know!

Went and ate my beloved beef nasi beriani, should be contented because God knows when I last ate it. Somemore with my beloved bf. The feeling was just not right.

Came back from work, I saw 3 parcels awaiting me to unwrap them. Should be excited like hell but I just could not be myself. (still play with them like they were my new toys because I super love lip glosses these days!)

Then watched 星光5 [荣誉]. Again, God knows what went wrong in me, I felt like crying upon hearing each song they sang. Not that touching actually. Did not touch my heart though, but the feelings just came up to me. I hold my treasured tears because it was nothing to cry for! siao, super emo lar! By the way, I like Olivia Ong :) Then got addicted to Olivia, started playing her songs from 8pm to 12am? Lol, this is just me, would play the same song/ album repeatedly if I like it for that very moment! Speechless, huh?

Then ZS called me up, informing me he was going with his former schoolmates, that was 8.40pm. There he went missing until 12.19am I started to worry and rang him. Okay, he was on his way going home fetching another friend. This is the first time I actually did not get moody over him going out with his friends, leaving me alone at home. I seriously think I have grown. When he got home, he called me and it was very unhappy. He said I talked nonsense, I was just asking "all boys ar?" Anything wrong meh? Unless he was hiding something lor. Don't care lar! Fuck it, like I care!

I am already very emo for the WHOLE day, now he even pissed me with that "nonsense" issue. What is his problem?! But I did not raise my voice or what, because I already promised myself to change, so I cannot be so easily defeated one lor! Then I thought of a good way to 发泄, so I am here blogging again. Express my feelings here is better than shouting at him right, readers? Now I feel like crying again. I just don't know why! Can someone please tell me why am I so emotionally unstable today? Just feeling very sad inside, is it a sign to bad incidents? Please God, I want everyone around me to be happy, please use your power to stop anything bad from happening.

Anyway, thanks baby for fetching me these few days. Only a few days more, ok? Bear with it, please. Love you :)

｡◕‿◕｡ by girlny @ 12:34:00 AM



Went back to Malacca with ZS in the afternoon just now. Definitely not my day. It just sucks!

All the incidents just happened without expecting, ended up quarrelling. Actually not quarrelling, he never intended to quarrel, neither did I. It was my attitude problem and some communication problems, but I believe it's not me alone, partially his fault too. I choose not to go into details. Anyway, we ended up with angry parting. I was angry, he was angry. I showered him with my sarcasm; he repaid me with "tu..tu.." over the phone. We are not the same person like how we started our chemistry. So different now. We both just want face. No one is willing to lose. And we are not talking to each other. He did not contact me, neither did I. I wanted to call but ... ... I chose not to because I know you need to calm down and did not wish to talk to me.

I tried hard, very hard to treat him very nicely these 4 days. Okay, I know! It was just freaking 4 days. Compared to the past 2 years, I was shouting at him almost everyday. We cannot live in peace one. I seriously showed my efforts even he did not give me something in return. I guess I have hurt him too much, way too much! He could have acted normally and being not appreciative; I don't mind, seriously. But the sentence just destroy all my faith and confidence. I want encouragements, in fact I need them to make changes. I need them to motivate me to becoming a better person. I need them to improve my real personality deep inside of me. I really really do. But you just gave me the opposite one.

I seriously wanna make changes to save this relationship because I care. It hurts when you do not see a future with your current partner. When you don't see him as your lifetime partner, it's even worse. What's the point being together now right? Time and youth consuming.

This was the first night I actually drove out to seek calmness. Sad, alone, being left were the words attacking me. In this one and a half hour, I have learned a lot from my lovely housemate since Alpha, one of my favourite girlfriends in my uni life. She taught me a lot of principles I predicted wrongly in the past. I am really grateful, thank God I have you. If not you, I would not know these new stuffs that supposed to be general knowledges to me. If not you, I would not know how to face this all alone. If not you, I would not have enlightened. If not you, I would still be miserable.

I am willing to learn, baby.
Are you willing to accept the new me?
Are you willing to believe in me again?

｡◕‿◕｡ by girlny @ 1:30:00 AM



I am back! I AM BACK!

just went through all the troubles to recover my passwords. yes, i forgot my password. dun blame me lar, see how long I've not logged in already. I wonder is there anyone still remember this blog. anyway, I promised myself to continue maintaining this blog with sharing my wonderful life!

Stay tuned!

:)

｡◕‿◕｡ by girlny @ 1:49:00 AM



On the 8th of August, we celebrated 3cai's 21st birthday at carry on steamboat, after that we headed to the long bridge at PORTUGUESE VILLAGE/PORTUGUESE SETTLEMENT, I believed those who's Malaccan studying in Malacca should know, because PS is famous of the long bridge and open house during Christmas. Too bad, today I am not writing any "tourism" post or whatever which praise PR but I write this post to warn/inform everyone about my bad experience there.



stay tuned!

i will update after m y test

｡◕‿◕｡ by girlny @ 12:29:00 PM





｡◕‿◕｡ by girlny @ 2:08:00 AM